Not every one of our brilliant products ends up being a best-seller. Sometimes, their duds. Which means they weren't as brilliant as we thought. And thus, we get rid of them- ASAP. (And if the people who wrote these 'brilliant' items don't start writing better stuff, they just might end up joining them. Yes, I'm talking about you, Eric.)
Exaggerators Anonymous - A Trillion Strong and Growing
Warning - May Spontaneously Combust
The Time For Action Is Past. Now is the time for senseless bickering.
(text) I Demand Justice or, if there mus be injustice, let it be in my favor.
(text) Don't Ever Change. I always want to be better than you.
End Corruption. Or at least let me participate in it.
Please Remain Calm- it's no use both of us being hysterical at the same time.
(text) I Expected Times Like This- but never thought they'd be so bad, so long and so frequent.
(text) I Hope The World Doesn't End on a day when I'm already in a bad mood.
(text) Blame my parents.
You'll tell your grandkids about this moment.
(text) I don't have ADHD - you're just really boring.
I Voted - then I vomited.
Clueslessness - There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots.
(text) Mistakes - It could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others
(text) Potential - not everyone gets to be an astronaut when they grow up
Worth: Just because you're necessary doesn't mean your important.
(text) Wishes - When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
(text) BP: We're bringing oil to American shores.
(text) Toyota: Once you drive one, you'll never stop.
(text) Twitter: never before have so many people with so little to say said so much to so few.
(text) Tiger - The Lyin' King
(text) Goldman Sucks
(text) Solyndra - It seemed like a bright idea at the time.
(text) Warning May Spontaneously Combust
(text) Noise Hazard Ear Protection Recommended
(text) Warning Highly Acidic
(text) Caution Extremely Magnetic
(text) I didn't even want to know 1 random thing about you.
(text) Optimists are half full of it
(text on asphalt shirt) Community Cheat: Taxpayers fell for your 'I'm to big to fail' crap - collect $700,000,000,000
(text on black shirt) Community Cheat: Your 'investment' in congress paid off - get out of jail, free
(text on white shirt) Cheat: You bilked widows & orphans with your ponzi scheme. You're under house arrest (in your $8M penthouse)
(text) Yikes! And I thought I was screwed up...
(text) ...She loves me not... (women's variation - ...He loves me not...)
(text) Overtime Play
(text on truck) Rainbow Chasers
(text) Free Tibet Now! Made in China
(text) overhead view - you are here - coolest person in the world
(text) More people have read this shirt than your blog.
(text) Peerless! It's not that I have no equal. It's just that I have not friends.
(text) Christian Bale and I are done professionally.
I just unlocked the 'Stalker' badge.
(text) Facebook: Let your fingers do the stalking
(text) The more of my behavior you accept, the less you will have to forgive.