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  • Build Your Own 2014 Calendar

    You choose your start month, your favorite demotivational designs, and we'll print it and ship it to you in no time! It's the perfect year-round heartbreaker!

  • The discovery that you're no longer a big fish in a small pond, or even a small fish in a big pond, but a small fish in a big fish.
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    Acquisition

    The discovery that you're no longer a big fish in a small pond, or even a small fish in a big pond, but a small fish in a big fish.

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  • The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly.
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    Ambition

    The journey of a thousand miles sometimes ends very, very badly.

    Perfect For:

    • Salmon with delusions of grandeur
    • Hungry bears looking for something to go with that delicious beurre blanc
    • Non-vegetarians living in the Pacific Northwest (both of them)
    • Disaffected college students

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  • May not be warranted at this point.
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    Hope

    May not be warranted at this point.

    Perfect For:

    • Corporate raiders
    • Overly optimistic ornithologists
    • Soon-to-be carrion
    • Disaffected college students

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  • Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can walk.
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    Limitations

    Until you spread your wings, you'll have no idea how far you can walk.

    Perfect For:

    • Good-natured Linux users
    • Nuns
    • Burgess Meredith
    • Disaffected college students

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  • Pain is just weakness leaving the body. Sometimes your spirit tags along with it.
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    Pain

    Pain is just weakness leaving the body. Sometimes your spirit tags along with it.

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  • Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.
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    Tradition

    Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.

    Perfect For:

    • Animal rights activists who cannot believe how far we have not come
    • Ernest Hemingway (“I hung the poster on the wall. It was funny, and colorful. Jim came with a cup of coffee. The coffee was hot, and good. We looked at the poster and laughed.”)
    • Disaffected college students

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    This item is currently sold out!
  • Because soaring with the eagles requires so much more effort.
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    Underachievement (Penguin)

    Because soaring with the eagles requires so much more effort.

    Perfect For:

    • Chilly Willy
    • Mario Lemieux
    • Tuxedo designers
    • Disaffected college students

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